NPR Watch (9/13/18)

I heard the following breathless report on National Public Radio yesterday, concerning Hurricane Florence: “[Someone] is reporting 80 foot waves.

Yep, you read that right: “80 foot waves.” Waves that are eight stories tall!

This is, of course, way, way, way bigger than the tsunami that devastated Phuket Island in Thailand in 2004.

A third-grader would have known that Hurricane Florence wasn’t capable of generating 80-foot waves. Eight-foot waves, maybe, but not 80-foot monsters, as NPR reported — as “news” on 9/13/18.

But the reporterette “reported” to you and me — as news!(1) — that Hurricane Florence was producing 80-foot waves.

After I stopped laughing at the absurdity of it all, I thought to myself: Does anyone need any other proof that the personnel of NPR are nothing more than mildly skilled readers of someone else’s copy?(2)

You and I both know that some idiot in the NPR copy-writing pool wrote “80” instead of “8” and the “mistake”(3) got into the copy to air over national news in the afternoon.

It was funny, because no one offered any correction. Not Audie Cornish, the stuperous afternoon/evening anchor, who always seems ready to drop her head onto her keyboard in sleep, or to burst out crying, or to choke on her sunflower kernels; not Ari Shapiro, the other afternoon/evening anchor, who flounces his way from silliness to insipidity… no  one. In other words, there was no one at NPR who heard, or realized, that they had just reported a bunch of nonsensical, impossible, ridiculous, alarmist flapdoodle as… actual news.

Look, I understand bad copy, and typos. I don’t understand not correcting something that’s obviously false, and stupid, and incorrect, that you’ve reported as “news” when it’s obviously false. I’d be frickin’ embarrassed if that kind of slop went over air waves I controlled. Maybe that’s just me.(4)

Unless, of course, you want to pretend that you never make mistakes.

Come to think of it, that is the way of the Left: They never make mistakes. Never. It’s like the old joke:

Rule #1: The Left never makes a mistake; Rule #2: If the Left makes a mistake — no matter how stupid — see Rule #1.”

(Note: they then build their stupid mistake into the canon of leftist thought. See, eg.: Marx, Karl; Stalin, Josef; Hitler, Adolf; Sanders, Bernie; Ocasio-Cortez, Alexandria, et al)

Question to NPR reporters: If you’re nothing more than a mildly talented actor, reading a script, why on earth should anyone give any credence whatsoever to what you say?

Answer: We shouldn’t.

Why shouldn’t we just consider you a bunch of low-information, brainless, uneducated, illiterate, left-wing (but, I repeat myself) propagandists? A herd of Tokyo Roses? A gaggle of Hanoi Janes? A pod of Leni Riefenstahl’s? A bunch of drones?

Answer: We should.

— xPraetorius


(1) You know: facts. Truth. Things that we know to be true. Things that we know to be reported to us as facts. Things like: XYZ Agency reported today that the U.S population is 324,167,853.Or: Some Idiot today said that Lucky Charms are bad for you. When you see reporting like that, you know that you can assess whether or not someone actually said it.

(2) You know, for any conspiracy theorists out there: these are the puppet-masters; the ones pulling the strings. I have to admit that from time to time, I’m sympathetic to this point of view. After all, it always seems to turn out to be part of a larger conspiracy.

(3) Mistake? Who knows? After all, NPR is full to overflowing with brain-dead leftist asses. Who knows whether one of those selfsame asses didn’t try to sneak some total crap into the evening “newscast” just to see what he could get away with? Well, to this point anyway, he’s got away with it!

(4) If you follow our series — NPR Watch — here in these pages, you know that NPR ought to spend most of their time being embarrassed by the codswallop they report as “news” each morning and afternoon. Enter “NPR Watch” (not case-sensitive) into our search box, for a listing of the features we’ve done to  expose NPR’s bias. Read why we’ve concluded that you always, always, always, come out of any session with “NPR News” less informed than when you go in.


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