In this post on his website, the great Mark Steyn, the finest political commentator in the world today (above, looking very much like Sean Bean), says a lot of things that we’ve been saying. Only, as usual, Steyn says it all better.
He’s the king, the emperor, the Babe Ruth, Jack Nicklaus, Roger Federer, Tom Brady, Wayne Gretzky and Pele all rolled up into — well rolled up into Mark Steyn — the undisputed master of the perfect bon mot.
His point in the linked post is something that we’ve been meaning to say here in these pages as well: The American Left doesn’t care one whit about “sexual harassment.” It doesn’t concern them in the slightest, except insofar as it can be a tool to fool some large number of votes into supporting Democrats in the next election cycle.
And we would have got around to making that point, but again, Steyn would have made it better. Never has there been a writer who can make you laugh and cry at the same time as can Mark Steyn. Here are some of the well-turned phrases of his piece.
First, just a wonderful summary of the Democrat Party’s plans for the next election:
So they’ve belatedly realized that their over-investment in the violent rapist and his enabler [Editor’s Note: Bill and Hillary Clinton] proved near-fatal last year. To win in 2020, the party has to get back some of those white females. Hence the decision to go full-scale war-on-women. Which means Franken and John Conyers are expendable. The Democrats are preparing to weaponize sex as they’ve weaponized race since the civil-rights era.
As mentioned above: “weaponize sex as they’ve weaponized race” is as near perfect a sum-up of the Left’s modus operandi as you’ll ever see.
Next, Steyn gives us an excerpt from one of his books, The [Un]documented Mark Steyn. Here’s his introduction to that passage:
Here’s what I wrote almost twenty years ago in the Speccie – April 1998 – when Gloria Steinem was arguing in The New York Times that dropping your pants and inviting a woman to “kiss it” was “not harassment” but an example of “the commonsense guideline to sexual behavior that came out of the women’s movement” – and only uptight GOP squares felt otherwise. Tell it to Harvey Weinstein, Matt Lauer, Charlie Rose, John Conyers and all the other Clinton karaoke acts of the last month.
“Clinton karaoke acts!” perfect!
Now, some more from the excerpt that Steyn has pulled from The [Un]documented Mark Steyn:
I confess I didn’t notice the piece at first; I was too busy drooling over the Playboy Implants of the Month centerfold. But a pal pointed it out to me and my reaction was as immediate as his: as the eponymous swinger of Austin Powers, International Man of Mystery would say, “Shagadelic, baby! Let’s shag!!” It turns out we’d both completely misread “the commonsense guideline to sexual behavior that came out of the women’s movement”. For years, the more straightforward feminists have stomped around in fierce T-shirts demanding, “What Part of NO Don’t You Understand?” Quite a big part, it seems. I didn’t realize “No” includes one complimentary grope with optional pants-drop and positioning of feminist hand on aroused male genital area. If she doesn’t go for it, well, no hard feelings (except on your part): just extricate your fingers from her underwiring and move on to the next broad. Your feminist credentials are impeccable: you didn’t rape her, so give yourself a pat on the back and the next one a pat on the butt.
Who knew that’s what “No” meant?!? This is classic Steyn: “If she doesn’t go for it, well, no hard feelings (except on your part): just extricate your fingers from her underwiring and move on to the next broad. Your feminist credentials are impeccable…”
I’m sorry, but even though the subject isn’t particularly elevating, the writing is some of the finest in any subject.
Here’s some more:
In such a world, many of us potential rapists have found it easier to stay indoors and finish that novel or concerto we’ve always meant to write – although even then our sins will find us out. Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony, according to feminist musicologist Susan McClary, reveals “the throttling murderous rage of a rapist incapable of attaining release”. As they say at the Vienna Conservatory, “What part of Nein don’t you understand?”
See what I mean? Only Mark Steyn could cobble together the nutball feminist with Beethoven’s great Ninth, and the indignant feminist admonition, to arrive at the absolutely perfect: “What part of Nein don’t you understand?”
Steyn does that kind of thing all the time.
Stein continues, in a riot of rapid-fire sarcasm that would cause even the great Solzhenitsyn to gasp in wonderment, and Robin Williams if he were still alive today, to bow down in tribute:
Happily, in this minefield of confusion, Ms Steinem has now simplified the rules. In the dark ages, senior executives would simply sidle up to the new girl in the typing pool and utter boorish, chauvinist, intimidating cracks like, “Why, Miss Jones, you’re beautiful without your glasses.” Today, under Ms Steinem’s “commonsense guideline”, the sensitive Clintonian New Man can instead say, “Why, Ms Jones, you’re beautiful without my pants on.” I think I speak for most unreconstructed old sexists when I say that we’ll gladly tear up the offensive snaps of the missus, willingly forswear insulting remarks about nice legs, lay off allusions to that misogynist Shakespeare and swap that rapist stuff by Beethoven for something more enlightened (“Yo, Bitch, Sit On This”) if in return we can solicit fellatio from every well-stacked chick in the accounts department.
These are great passages, but their context is even better. You should read Steyn’s piece in its entirety. You should read everything that he’s ever written. He’s never bad! He’s even an outstanding, highly knowledgeable music critic, whose writings on that subject are wonderful! And, to add insult to injury for us more ordinary mortals, he’s a pretty good singer! I like this one, for example. And this one. (Note: he’s not a highly trained singer, just a pleasant, folksy one whose occasional estrangement from the odd note is actually endearing.)
There’s a truism about Mark Steyn: everything he writes has the possibility of being the best thing written on a given topic. There are only a few writers like that, including Kevin Williamson and Jonah Goldberg of National Review, as well as the great Ann Coulter.
Here’s one more just to send you off on a high note:
There’s just one thing that bothers me. As I arrived at the office with my boxers round my ankles, I couldn’t help thinking: this new revised feminism is great for guys, but what’s in it for women?
I mean, I know Monica Lewinsky was the only White House intern to land a full-time job with the federal government, but, for most other women, Ms Steinem’s license to grope could mean a lot of unwanted traffic across their brassieres and a lot of executive penises being waved in their faces. What does the sisterhood get in return?
Well, as Gloria sees it, it’s an acceptable “combat risk”. “For one thing,” she writes, “if the President had behaved with comparable insensitivity toward environmentalists, and at the same time remained their most crucial champion and bulwark against an anti-environmental Congress, would they be expected to desert him?”
“unwanted traffic across their brassieres and a lot of executive penises being waved in their faces…”
Ouch! Ummm… it’s a bit risqué, but it’s right On. The. Nose. The Left doesn’t give the tiniest hoot about sexual harassment. In fact, if news reports are to be believed, it’s one of their favorite pastimes.
You should remember that, as you hear Democrat after Democrat pontificating on the “horrors” of sexual harassment, and implying that he’d (or she’d) never… Just remember, they’re probably coming from some place where he’s (or she’s) just done it… and they’re praying they don’t get caught. For Democrats and for the Left, there are five words that cause them cold, heart-stopping terror: “A woman has come forward.”
Do yourself a favor and read Steyn’s piece right here.