It’s that great song by John Lennon, right? I mean, who doesn’t like Imagine?(1)

Imagine, if you will, the song Imagine, as it should have been written. Something more closely dealing with the world as it is, as opposed to the world as John Lennon perceived it to be. Maybe something like this:

Imagine there’s no heaven
Then what’s the point of you?

No hell below us…
Again, what’s the point of you?

Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today… Aha-ah…
(Said the grasshopper to the ant…)

Imagine there’s no countries
It isn’t hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion, too
Again, what’s the point of you?
If you’re not willing to kill or die
for anything, then what do your children,
your wife, your mother and father,
your brothers and your sisters,
your path through history?
What does any of it mean?


Imagine all the people
living life in peace,
but with no God, what’s stopping
them… from killing you?


You may say I’m a dreamer,
But it sounds like a nightmare to me
I hope someday you’ll grow up
and see the world for what it is…

Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
Why? Because you say so?
Who are you? A freakin’ “beatle?”


We should take you seriously?
How’s that?

No need for greed or hunger
When was there ever a “need” for hunger?
What lyricist wrote this codswallop?

A brotherhood of man
Yep, we’re all about this…
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world… You…

Oops… there are all those
pesky freakin’ people
getting in the way …
of this beautiful scene,
and acting just like freakin’… people.

You may say I’m a dreamer
But I’m not the only one
I hope someday you’ll figure it all out
And the world will live as one

I admit, there might be meter, rhythm and rhyme problems, but if you wordsmith it a bit, it might not be the pathetic, ridiculous, vapid, tedious, tendentious, little piece of c**p that it is.

— xPraetorius


(1) I don’t. It’s a stupid, insipid, idiotic, inane little ditty, chock full of gauzy, meaningless pabulum. In other words a masterpiece of contemporary pop culture.

4 thoughts on “Imagine…

  1. We change things up from time-to-time, viewer. This essay was written by our “Culture Correspondent,” (for lack of a better title) and I happen to know that the song Imagine has been a pet peeve of hers for a long time. 🙂


    — x

  2. I like that song, Mike! I even liked this one: (Prince, Tom Petty, Steve Winwood, Jeff Lynne).

    I got a kick out of Prince’s tossing his Telecaster up into the rafters… whence it returned not to earth. Campy stunt — but what is rock ‘n roll if not campy stunts, along with the occasional melody? — but I still got a kick out of it.

    I used to be of the belief that music had to be appreciable by the blind, for whom such a stunt would be meaningless, and have since come ’round to think that multi-sensory music is okay.


    — x

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